Kids Should Be Seen Not Heard
Kids Should Be Seen Not Heard (WR)
The feeling of defeat, of being unseen. The reality of being a child and staying in a kid’s place. “Kids should be seen not heard”, was a phrase that haunted me. Never really understanding why elders were deserving of reverence, because like me, they were still learning, still filled with flaws. What we fail to do is listen to our youth, we’re quick to write them off as inexperienced, and lacking in wisdom. Human nature is creating power structures that we are obligated to abide by, the same way we treat “uneducated” people who are without college degrees, juxtapositions the way we view children. The reality is that, in fact, we can afford to listen to everyone, because they add perspective.
To me, wisdom is knowledge of the human experience and understanding how others lives to play out. I’ve seen countless times, adults who think they have nothing to learn from youth. They’re quick to shut their ears off as soon as the mouth of a child opens, but what they fail to acknowledge is that generational differences make giving everyone a listen worthwhile. Children should listen to adults to gain perspective, but parents also need to start listening to their children. Relationships thrive off of reciprocated acknowledgment of each other, this is why many Black families are defunct. Because one-sided, cult-like reverence is engraved in the culture of Black parenting. As soon as a child pops up to share an exciting moment in their life “Kids should be seen not heard”. This could be as mundane as learning a new dance move, but the memory of their parent sitting there supporting them along the way is priceless. I believe that “Inside Out” depicts how memories control our lives. The idea of a “core memory” is a concept I find particularly intriguing because for every human, we all have moments in time that we’ll never forget. Our first book, that one night that you and your siblings bonded over boredom, and I believe the dismissal of a child blocks core memories. Often in the Black community the ones who are ignored and dismissed grow up not knowing they’re loved, or thinking that they aren’t unique enough to be deserving of captivating others’ attention.
To me, this is why children should be heard not seen, because taking a moment to listen, to process, is detrimental to the development of a child. Take 30 minutes today, and when you ask them how was their day, don’t treat it like a TikTok video that you can pause and play, and tell your child today, that you see them, you hear them, and you love them forever and always
copyright © micah hill 2024
